Saturday, April 23, 2011

Out of breathe


Rutgersfest '11 was RIDICULOUS! Then Mel and I went to my grandparents for the Passover Seder.  It was so much fun and

Out of breathe

Sunday, April 17, 2011

My grant application has been sent and now I just have to wait. Oh fun!! lol
Now I am focusing on the now instead of the future and living life. And since I am doing that, I am wondering if it is worth it to stay faithful (even though we were never official) with Disney.

On friday, I went to visit my almost brother at Rutgers. It was so much fun!! I love him and his Sammy brothers. What made the weekend better was one of his brothers that I had a crush on when I first met him is now single! I met him 2 years ago and have been to a few events over the years that we both attended.
It would be amazing if a boy actually fought for me. That's all a boy needs to do to impress me. As soon as I like a boy my game goes. It would mean the world to me if the man took control and swept me away so our conversations will be easy.
Last night, a group of boys came up to my friends and I to talk. Even though my friends got distracted with something else they stayed and talked to me. Which was really nice. Made me feel a bit special 

Apple iphone 4 Problems

I have gone through 4 going on 5 iphone 4's. How ridiculous is that???  

July: Waited in line for the iphone 4 on the day it was released. 

August: Left my phone on the roof of my car and well...... 

August: Dropped my phone face down, cracked the screen. 

October: Cracked the back 

March: Left my phone in a cab and it drove off to the ghetto 

April: Cracked my screen and now the buttons (theres only two) wont work.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

AAHH Excitng

My 1st Draft of my Grant Application is DONE!!!

Going to see my "Almost-Brother/Best Friend" Zack and his fraternity brothers for Rugtersfest!!!!

I am going to see Lady Gaga on Tuesday!!!! 


All my hard work has been paying off!!! It feels good to have things come easy for once. I have been handed a plate of shit for years, finally life is giving me a 5 star meal. 

Tuesday, April 12, 2011


I just finished my first draft of my grant application!!! Yay!! This is one huge leap towards launching my website. Fingers crossed I get the money!! If i get the money I will use it to pay the web designer. I think that's the guy that makes all the code. Should probably already know that lol.  
I do have some leverage for getting my grant accepted. Turns out that the people that would give me the money and help me launch my site, need to connect with the students in my major. Whoot Whoot bonus points lol!! 

Talking to Disney. I am so bad at conversations lol.


You know I have realized as I think about Disney and my friend's relationship dilemma's? The exes do more long term damage then they realize. I have a TERRIBLE track record thus far. And I have only had 4 relationship in the past 8 years. None of them were longer than 3 months at the most. the last boyfriend I was when I was going into my senior year of high school. Ask me sometime about the shit he did to me. You will think it came from a horror or lifetime movie.

My superior taste in men plus some intense family drama has caused me to have major trust issues with men. I think that is why i have been having a hard time dealing with open things were left when Disney went to Disney. He is the first sweet, sexy, handsome man that has liked me. (That I noticed lol) I don't want to loose him. We have great chemistry in public and private. There aren't any expectations because we want to be together. Hopefully he will text me on my birthday, cause then I know he still thinks about me. Plus if he does then I can start planning my trip to visit and see him in his steamy flight suit costume he has to wear. ; ) 


There are gunna be some changes to my posts from now on. I am going to try to incorporate at least one picture with every post. I think that will break up some of my longer entries and give my new readers a new reason why they should read. lol

According to my friends, I am a strong, confident person. This is a total shocker to me. I think of myself as someone that is confused and insecure. Guess I gotta work on my inner self image then.

  I need to overcome my fear of cockroaches. Yesterday there was a massive one in my apt! I spider-ed up the walls when i saw it. And then i almost left my apt without my keys or cellphone when it came towards me. Gosh I hate big bugs.
So I figured out how to sort my feelings about Disney. I am definitely going to wait until he returns. Last night, I read all about his and mine horoscopes. I didn't do any capability tests, just simply read about the traits certain signs.  They were dead on about my sign Taurus. It was a bit mind-blowing how true the descriptions a  Taurus was. When I read his, I realized that I need to back off n give him space cause his sign does not do well to clingy people.  I'm weird don't judge lol.

I think I am doing the right thing by waiting. It proves to myself that I can be faithful to someone while they are away. Plus not focusing on boys give me time to spend time with my friends that are leaving soon and my senior project. Also when I partied at his fraternity, a boy recognized me as being his date. And he said that he could see why Disney likes me. A compliment I found quite flattering and one of the few specific things I remember of that night lol. They serve some STRONG mixed drinks and I had more than 5. Just saying

 I have been busy with my senior project and homework. Don't worry I haven't forgot about keeping you updated. As a token of my apology for being gone a few days, below is a first draft of a comedy skit I am currently working on.

The Family followed by the Rabbi and the Hertz are arriving to the cemetery for the burial ceremony on warm sunny day. Just as my grandma steps out of the car, a  strange woman  enters.

Woman: I'm sorry you can't bury the body here.

Grandma: And why is that?

Woman: You didn't fill out the forms properly.

Grandma: How do you know?

Woman: You are here to bury Dr. Hollander right?

Grandma: No really how do you know?

Woman: It was put on the schedule but left incomplete. I need your forms.

Grandma: I don't understand, I called three - four times over the past two days. I don't think you would have had the gravediggers create a spot for the body, if my forms weren't in.

Aunt: Wait, who are you?

Woman: I am the secretary for the overseeing the cemetery grounds.

Grandma: Well, nice to meet you. I still don't understand, why we can't continue?

Secretary: Like a told you before your forms weren't in.

Family member: shit, it's haute outside Lady.

Family member 2: It's not gunna take long to realize how inconvenient you informed us this dilemma.
Aunt: well, I used my connections and I got connected to someone important that wants to speak to you.

Aunt hands cell phone to secretary.

Family Member: who are you on the phone with?

Aunt: Just the governor. We are friends and I informed him  about the situation.

Secretary comes back.

Secretary: sorry about the confusion. I probably just lost one of the forms. Carry on.

I hope you like the random pictures I am going to be adding to give my blog a bit more spunk. Sometimes pictures are louder than words

Saturday, April 9, 2011


I am spending the entire weekend working on my grant application and my senior project presention. And well..... It isn't going as well as yesterday. I have been sitting at the computer finding ways to inspire my thinking cap so it can start working. Guess I can't force it. Oh well. Decided to look up different expressions of love with art for motivation. Here's what I found: 
Ever ever after
If we just don't get it our own way
Ever ever after
It may only be a wish away

Sometimes you reach what's real just by making believe
Unafraid, unashamed
There is joy to be claimed in this world
You even might wind up being glad to be you

"The way he treated me and the way I treated him, the way we took care of each other and our family, while he lived. That is so much more important than the idea I will see him someday. I don’t think I’ll ever see Carl again. But I saw him. We saw each other. We found each other in the cosmos, and that was wonderful."

Friday, April 8, 2011

Holy Shit Wow Omg

So my senior project has taken another major leap in the right direction. I was on cloud 9 two days ago, now I'm on a level above that!!

My only obligation on Friday is to make it to intro to dance from 12-1pm.  So after class today, I saw a sign that said it was research day at the gym. I had nothing better to occupy my time besides go in and see my friend's booth. Let me just say, Best Decision Ever! There was a lot of engineering and science projects. The first booth that caught my attention was called Law of Reflection. This female chemistry major incorporated the science behind mirrors with dance choreographed. Her project was fascinating especially since her only connect to the performing arts was the dance ensemble. After talking to her, I knew who I was going to talk to next when I saw people with instruments.  The two musicians that I had started a conversation with happened to be the same guys that were in my friends' senior project. I told them about my senior project and they on board to sign up.

I saw one of my friends had a booth, so that was the next place I drifted too. Him and a few other musicians started an improv-ing with words group. After listening to their explanation about the project, turns out the site I am creating would be perfect for them! They have the structure of student-run group figured out but they need help with taking it to the next step. As we were having this conversation, I found out that improv jazz music group is backed by one of the music industry department heads. I told him about my project and now I have another dept head coming to my presentation. I was also able to see my other friend and hear about the projects he is creating. And I got the contact information of the person to reach at the iSchool who will direct me to the person that can help me.

I need to go. I will keep maintaining this trend of posting progress of senior project....

...... Aaaaannnd I am back. Definitely not as funny as the first time I wrote it. I was updating this post and had just completed a detailed (& organized) time line of how I am going launch my senior project. Alright, take two. 

  Phase 1: Students to Students
·       During summer term 
o   Site becomes functional  
·       Objective:
o   Word of mouth marketing
§  Facebook 
§  E-mails
§   School Blogs
§   Contacting Student- run organizations 
§  Asking friends in Greek life to spread the word to their chapters 
*     Phase 2 : Exposure to the Professor 
o    Summer Term + Following week
§  Towards the end of summer term when...
§  Professors begin to tweak their syllabus for...
§  Deadline that must be at least 2 weeks before the first week of fall term
·       Objectives
o   Functional Site
o   Email is sent sent to professors in the art school 
o   In enough time input information before 1st week of classes  

*     Phase 3: From Professors to Students
·       Fall Term
o   1st week of classes 
§  Students are get their syllabus 
o   2-3rd week of classes
§  Feedback e-mail 
·       Professors
o   Last week of term 
§  Feedback e-mail sent 
·       Professors 
·       Students
·       Elements Needed
o   Feedback E-mail for Professors, Students, Talent & Student Run Organizations  
§  Foundation resource for..
·       Interacting with the specific user for...
o   listening to feedback on...
o   Their user experience
o   Reactions on how they see others use it
o   Creating the door frame for questions to be asked
·       An opportunity to create mini social networks within site.
o   Professors connecting with…
§  Other professors at different colleges and universities

Senior Project Celebration

The reason that haven't posted recently is because there have been a variety of things going on in my life and in my head.

I do have some major news to report. All of the progress I have made over spring break has attracted a whirlwind of successful process. Its inspiring to reek the benefits after numerous bloody internal battles to fight writer's block.  I am still at war with distractions. It has been pulling teeth to concentrate solely on breaking down and thoroughly explaining all the elements that make up my senior project.  I am slowly winning the war by fighting la resistance with small doses of variety.

I managed to produce a hard copy of 10 single-spaced pages to hand to my adviser on the explanation of how my project changed and what the next steps are to bring my idea to life. Just handing him the stapled pages of progress felt amazing. Ever since I took his class, I have had a HUGE professional crush on my adviser which enables my constant need to produce a quality of work that impresses him. He was impressed and supportive as to how my senior project has blossomed into what very well be my career when I graduate. My nerves instantly melted as he listen to my explanation of my new execution plan. My nerves were soon replaced with an overwhelming sensation of  flattery when he compliment my senior project by saying "This is Big." As our meeting came to a close, I was overwhelmed with the satisfaction of successfully accomplishing my personal goal to impress him.

Our meeting lasted over an hour and basically we agreed on a game plan for the remaining 7 weeks left before its due. It was decided that I was going to give my presentation on the lessons I have learned working on my senior project.  Originally I was going to create a Philadelphia branch of a modeling agency based in Nashville. I was able to successfully write grant with a $322.35 reward.  The money I received from the EAM fund was supposed to be used organize a photo shoot. After setting a date, location, creating a style for the shoot, I ran into the obstacle of having talent for the shoot.  Even though the likelihood of successfully organizing  a photo shoot was diminishing, my research created an opportunity for a new window to open. (Insert cliche saying).

While I was doing my research, my parents began to have the difficult conversation of what my plans are going to be after I graduate. The build up of different pressures plus talking to my friends are two of the contributors that sum up my inspiration for the 180 flip.

It's late and even though I have more to say, I need to step away from the computer and close my eyes. Sweet dreams readers.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

April Fools

my annual april fools joke of changing my relationship status didn't go as planned this year. I think Disney actually thought I was in a relationship. I tried to have a conversation with him but he ignored me. So i sent him a cute text, well still no response.

Should I just move on, stop over thinking or just wait. I'm thinking distance makes the heart grow fonder.